You don’t know how many times I have heard women say that to me. And to be honest, I’ve had those same thoughts about Neil with things.
“I wish he would do this more, “I wish he would do that…”
But man, isn’t that exactly where the devil wants our thoughts? Focusing on their weaknesses instead of all the reasons you love him? Satan hates marriage! He wages war against yours and mine. The reason he goes so hard at them is because he knows it breaks up the picture of Christ and the church. Marriages were created by God to be a picture on earth of how Christ loves the church. The church being the bride and Christ being our husband. If satan can destroy the picture of how much God loves us, he claims a pretty big victory.
Ephesians 5:32-33 “This is a huge mystery, and I don’t pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.”
“Honor” doesn’t look like us wishing our husbands were different then they are or like someone else. I just imagine how hurt I’d be if I knew my husband thought “I wish Jill were more like her.” That thought lacks love, respect and honor. Jesus doesn’t wish we were someone else. He instead takes quiet and loving action in pursuit of us.
Luckily, the Bible is very clear. I’ve had women message me saying things like “I want my husband to be more in the Word, but he just isn’t there.” “I wish my husband would want to go to church. He just doesn’t.” “My husband won’t tithe and I know we should be, what do I do?” These nagging questions about our marriages are plenty. And you aren’t alone. But we have to be sure we don’t let these things destroy our marriages either. That’s not what God wants for us or his kingdom.
If your husband isn’t willing in an area and God hasn’t convicted him yet of the issue, then it’s not our jobs as wives to push our husbands to do anything. We are not to nag our husbands, we are to honor them like the verse says. But we are also to live by example. “Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives.” So keep doing the very thing you want your husband to do (be that example), then pray for your husband without ceasing, and watch God work!
It may take months or maybe even years, but GOD WILL WORK! Remember His timing is so much different than ours and always perfect. He is working on us the same time He is working on them. When you do this, you are also becoming more like Jesus.
Today we pray for our husbands and their relationship with you. In Matthew 6:33 you said “Seek first the kingdom of God and everything else will be added.” So we know once they have that figured out, then everything else will be too. We pray you set a fire deep down in their hearts for you. That they crave your presence. And that they thirst for your knowledge. We ask specifically in the area of ________ that you will convict their spirit. I also ask for you to help me as a wife to honor my husband and be strong enough to lead by example. Keep mine and my husbands thoughts about our marriage far from the devil. Protect our marriage and be our cord of three, so that it will never be broken. We ask this in your mighty and precious name.