My little boy,
I’ve dreamt about you…
I can’t tell you when the dreaming started. Actually, I don’t ever remember not dreaming of you. And now the time has come that you are slowly growing within and you will soon be here. 13 weeks to be exact. Well, that’s if you stay til you’re supposed to or show up when you’re supposed to. 34 years of life, dreaming of this moment and it’s here.
I want you to know some things…
First, I want you to know that you have one incredible daddy. I knew very early on when I met him that I’d be the luckiest person in the world to have him as my life partner and that my babies would be just as lucky to have him as a dad. Just wait, you’ll see. He will do anything to protect you, make you smile and make you understand that you are his LIFE. I’m so excited to see his face the first time he sees you. I’m excited to watch him hold you, make you giggle, play in the backyard with you and teach you all of what it means to be a man. Just watch him, follow what he does and you will grow up just right.
Secondly, I want you to know that you have a brother and two sisters that will love you and show you the way too. They are so excited to meet you. Especially your brother, he can’t wait to have a friend to play with and teach all about Star Wars and how to ride a bike. He has asked me so many times if you can hear him from inside my belly. I tell him yes and he tells you hello and sometimes kisses you goodnight. And your sisters, they are a little older but they can’t wait to hold you and take care of you. They will tell you all the things women want so that you can someday get the woman of your dreams. You will be receiving lots of cuddles and kisses from them in this lifetime. You’re very lucky.
Next, you have amazing grandparents that have lived for this day. The joy you will bring to their lives just by being born is something they’ve long awaited. They want to give you everything you want. The joy they see in mine and daddy’s eyes when we look at you is the best part for them. They prayed for me and your dad to have you. Seeing their babies have babies is what they’ve long for as time has gone by. You’re a dream come true for them too.
Also, you have some awesome aunts and uncles. They are so excited to see your dad and I fall in love with you. Just wait, watching your brother and sister have a baby is a pretty amazing thing and because they love us so much, they love you more than you can imagine. They were excited to find out you were a boy and they’ve already been picking some things out for your arrival. If some day your dad and mom aren’t around, you will enjoy just being in their presence because they will remind you so much of us. They will tell you stories about us that will make you laugh and you’ll know mommy and daddy even more because of them.
And here it goes, I love you. I don’t know how to explain it but the word love doesn’t seem like enough when I say how I feel about you. I’ve been carrying you around with me now for 6 months. But that very first day I found out you were coming, the world got brighter. The sky looked bluer. Everything looked more beautiful. The way I saw the world changed that day. You and I had moments together where I just had to pull over and cry and thank God for what he had done. It was surreal. When you see your first sunrise, take that and multiply it by 1000. That was the magnificence of that day. I’m telling you all this because you need to know how important you are and how loved you are and WORTHY of love you are. That is the magnificence of YOU. There will be people that may tell you or treat you otherwise in this life but you remember this letter and let these words sink deep down in your heart. People are people. And people make mistakes. They hurt others and they will hurt you too. But learn how to forgive quickly because they may never know the love that you will know.
But even greater than all the love I wrote about, there is a love so much bigger. It’s the greatest love of all. It’s a love that never makes mistakes. A love that is patient with you and always kind to you. There’s a love out there that never leaves you abandoned or alone. There is a love that no matter how bad you mess up, you can never be separated from this love. It’s a love that is incomprehensible but it can be known and felt and breaks every chain and struggle that the world presents. This love has a name and it’s name is Jesus. He died so you can live the life that mommy and daddy pray for you to live. I can’t wait to tell you all about Him. He is my everything and because of Him, you are here.
Lastly, I want you to remember something. Bad things happen here every day. And it’s true there are bad people. But there’s so much more to it. Some people might try to make you believe that everything and everyone is bad. But it’s not true. Trust me when I tell you, I’ve seen both. And life is good. Really good. But you have to choose the good. Life is as fragile as it is precious. So I want you to live a life that shows others the goodness that is here. I want you to show them love. All the love you receive I want you to give it out times ten. I want people to know love because they know you. And when someone is unkind, show them love anyway. You’ll be stronger for it even if it doesn’t feel like it at first. The only thing we really have in this world is love. And the only thing we will have when we go is that love. So take it all and give it all. It’s the most important gift you’ll ever receive.
You are love. And that is why the world changed the day I found out you were coming. Because I received the gift of you.
I love you always and forever,
Mom XO